When dating, we have two choices. We can either lose ourselves by compromising who we are and what God has made us be or lose ourselves by allowing God to shape us in his image.
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For years, I was happy being single. Naturally, during my years as a single Christian woman, I had crushes and possibilities, but inwardly, I thought that I was probably one of those Christians meant to be single my whole life. Instead of viewing this as a loss, I would instead get excited to think about all the people I could meet and help and all the trips I could take!
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In the early stages of dating there is a phase that we all probably walk through. This phase is called Rose-Colored glasses. It is when you are so caught up in infatuation and having a man pay attention to you that all reasoning and clear thinking goes out the window. We let things slide that are our core values.
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True confession: I’m not a huge fan of books on dating. I’ve always focused more on marriage. This is a personal preference. However, I LOVED Godly Dating 101. I think it’s an incredibly useful book - whether single, dating, or married. Why? Because the title is a sneaky one.
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You’ve heard the warning. Beware of the guy who wants you for your body. Watch for the one who leads you closer to the Lord. Run from the one who looks at you with lust. Well, I have a new warning for you.
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Many of you have likely wondered: “What exactly does a Godly man look like today?” There are numerous articles and books written about this topic, as each writer strives to uncover more of this mystery. Many of these types of lists are written from a woman's perspective, since not often do we hear from guys what their opinion of a godly man is.
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2014 dawned bright and I had love in my sights. I was searching for a man to walk into the future with, because I believed I needed a man to complete me. That fall, I was invited to a collegiate worship service at a nearby university. That’s where I saw him. He had dark hair, and eyes I thought held my future. I found out the hard way, that wasn’t the case.
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Like a growing number of people, I met my husband thanks to a dating app. Since things turned out well, I’m glad that I decided to try using the app, but I also spent a lot of time going on multiple dates with guys that were never going to work out.
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Years ago, when my boys were young and impressionable, one of the grandparents had a talk on modesty with them. They’d been upstairs, had all taken their bath before bedtime, and were probably running around naked (I’m rolling my eyes though - they were probably ages 5, 4, and 2). My husband’s dad taught them at that early age that it was good to keep private, what should be kept private. I don’t know why that stuck with all of us so much over the years, but I’m thankful for his lessons on this topic, because it’s something I think about often as a mom of four sons and my perspective comes more from this angle.
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Godly, socially adept men seem to be extinct, which makes dating hard. Too many disappointments, let-downs, or occasions of being “ghosted” have left their mark on the masses of Christian women and the general response is despair or cries of, “Where have all the good men gone?” I’ve even done this. I’ve been embittered and hopeless after one too many heartaches. I’ve blamed men for being too cowardly, too selfish, or, in some seasons of my life, too elusive.
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We all have hopes and desires for our lives, but what if we are in a season where there doesn't seem to be any opportunity for our dreams to be fulfilled? Many of us young women (including myself) are eager to find a husband and have a family. These desires rest deep inside our hearts and long to be fulfilled.
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Little girls often play house, innocently imagining themselves being married and having children. Later, those same little girls grow up to be young women who start dreaming of their wedding day, the white picket fence, and the fairytale, “happily EVER after.”
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The Bible doesn’t say anything about dating. It talks plenty about marriage, but it doesn’t talk about who should make the first move, the proper texting etiquette, and the many other questions Christian women encounter. That is what today’s article is all about - three steps that unmarried Christian women can take to be in a better position to date this year.
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We put marriage on such a high pedestal that to many it becomes an idol that defines womanhood. As if a woman only has worth if she is in a romantic relationship or if she is a wife and mother.
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