Beware Of The "Religious" Guy

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“Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.  Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others…” - Matthew 6: 1 -2

You’ve heard the warning.  Beware of the guy who wants you for your body.  Watch for the one who leads you closer to the Lord.  Run from the one who looks at you with lust.  Well, I have a new warning for you.

In recent years, girls have come to me with a new warning - beware of the religious guy.  What does this mean?  At one point, I had a young woman whose man put stipulations on how close her relationship with God was before she was marriage potential.  

In my own life, I had a young man who could not commit to girls but spiritually tied himself to them and used them as a buffer between him and other females.

Something else these young men did?  They asked these women to help lead their ministries - but offered them nothing in return.  If any of the young women did anything to lead other young women to Jesus or to minister to the poor, the men would not participate unless it was their idea.  False promises were made in dating.  

Lead this ministry with me, worship this much with me - then, you will be worthy of my love.

Three Negative Characteristics to Watch For:

  • A guy surrounds himself with people who need help, but you rarely see him with wise counsel.

  • A guy constantly puts down people who do not do the same ministries as him or are not as highly involved in ministry as him.

  • A guy pressures you to be involved in ministry or says you need to have a certain amount of faith to “be marriage material”.  They also will not hang out with people outside of ministry.

These “guys” say that they evangelize - instead of committing to the Biblical mandate to work and be a provider.  They tout their works before men to justify their lack of commitment.  They literally built homes under the false pretense of helping others, while avoiding the commitment and discipline of family.  These men will tell you that ministry is greater than family.  Women should expect to be placed on the back burner for the sake of ministry.  

Three Positive Characteristics to Look For:

  • A guy is focused/disciplined on finding what God has called him to do.

  • A guy is willing to say “no” to ministry opportunities when they do not align with His calling or interferes with his family.

  • A guy is intentional with the family and friends God has placed in his life.  He is also intentional and clear in his relationship with you.


Dear Daughter of Christ,

If this is you, RUN.  Jesus created relationships.  He created You before the world began.  You were His first thought - not His last.  A true, lasting Godly relationship will mirror Christ’s perspective of You.  He would leave the 99 to reach YOU.  He would not go to the 99 because they are more important.  Christ does not wait until “you are ready” to reach you.  He meets you right where you’re at.  The next time a man who loves Jesus pursues you - He will point you to Christ, He will walk alongside you where you are at, and you will build Christ’s kingdom together (after you are married - not before).  Jesus loves you and He will bring the right man into your life.  Never settle for less and do not be led by false spiritualism or religion.

Sincerely,

A Sister in Christ


ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Alycia Marie is a free-spirited wanderer learning to find roots. She currently resides in Milwaukee and serves the community of southeastern Wisconsin. You can typically find her outdoors, as long as it’s warm, hanging out with family/close friends and meeting soon-to-not-be strangers. In her spare time, she writes, drinks chai tea, and builds non-profits, homes, families, and people. Some people like to call it missions. She prefers well-digging.