I’m in one of those seasons of life that makes me question a lot. I’m questioning my motivations and passions and work habits. The future seems like a mass of unknowns and the past seems like a patchwork of disconnected experiences. Despite being 29 years old, I’m still not sure what I want to be when I grow up.
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I never knew I could deceive myself so well. That I could take such a good look at myself in the mirror and forget to even deal with the condition of my soul. Maybe this sounds deep for a Saturday morning, but after last night, I feel compelled to write this. As though maybe the thoughts that are all disjointed can coalesce into something meaningful. That maybe then, I'll be able to say, “Yes, that's what I'm thinking, that's what I need to change, that's where I'm struggling.” Goodness, I've never looked at myself so clearly as last night.
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Misused opportunities and unused talents. I think that's the best way I would describe the way most of us live out our youth. And for a lot of people, our whole lives. Because we have this mindset of "one day" and "not enough."
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Work...the word that can either inspire excitement or dread, pleasure or frustration, confidence or doubt. I’ve been working various jobs since I was seventeen years old, but it wasn’t until this year that the Lord began to open my eyes to the reality of how He is shaping my heart towards work.
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I’ve always been told that singleness in a season of waiting, and that’s almost right, we just need to make sure it’s the correct kind of waiting. We cannot be passively waiting, we need to be actively waiting.
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