Belonging In All Moments

“And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.”

-1 Corinthians 13:13 (NKJV)

I wish I could remember more from my wedding day.  I know many people say this, including my husband, who was understandably nervous that day. Yet, I had a seizure earlier that morning, so our wedding is a blur of snapshots in my mind. But as anyone who is married can attest, the wedding itself is only the beginning of a beautiful and fulfilling life with your spouse. 

I do wish that I could have a core memory of looking into my husband's eyes and feeling an abundance of love and a sense of belonging, but I don't. What I have is better. I may not have that one memory, but I have experienced his love every day since then. 

I know that I belong with him and that God brought us together in his perfect timing.

John is the kind and caring man I never knew I would need. He helps me through health issues, and even wakes up every morning to take our dog outside. When I have offered, he says he wants me to sleep. For him, my health and happiness are a priority.

For me, his comfort and contentment are a priority. I want our home to be a haven from the stress of life. I leave notes around the house so his morning starts well, and show him love by cooking delicious dinners. There is nothing a cast-iron skillet-cooked steak and homemade mashed potatoes can’t fix. When I hug John, I do it with all my being, knowing we both need that connection.

We can see that we love each other through these small actions, but they also tell us that we belong to one another. We are doing life together, complementing each other’s strengths and weaknesses. 

When one of us has a rough day, the other helps to alleviate the stress. When there is a lot to do, we do it together. We act as a team because we are one - an exceptional team of two, with one dog and one cat as our mascots.

This is not to say that we do not have our tiffs or different viewpoints on things - we do. We are both fallen people with sinful natures who need God's grace in our lives daily. Yet, we still desire to show love to one another, making daily choices that honor each other and our marriage.

Although we are only seven years into our marriage, we are continuously learning how to communicate in ways that strengthen our bond instead of breaking it. 

John and I married later in life. I was 41 and he was 46. We grew up with vastly different backgrounds, and were living in different states when we met online. Neither of us had been married before, despite having dated other people. We talk about how, with other people, it never felt right. 

But from our first date, we knew that there was something special between us. When John held my hands at dinner, I felt a current of electricity shoot up my arms. When we went for an evening walk, I called him “babe” when I asked him to put my purse in the trunk of his car. 

I even asked, on this romantic stroll in downtown Charleston, if he was going to ask me out on a second date. We still laugh about this, but it shows how quickly I felt comfortable with him after meeting him in person. 

The longer we are married, the more I can see how deeply and extensively John loves me. We have already lived our vows multiple times over - “To have and to hold, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish.” 

These vows, spoken by many others, signify one thing: a covenant —a solid, sacred relationship based on commitment and promises.

Our marriage covenant binds us together, uniting us in the most profound and beautiful way possible. Our vows were spoken in the presence of our family and friends, but most importantly, in the eyes of God. We know that God brought us together, understanding our pasts and preparing our future.

Think About It

This article may specifically be about marriage, but what do covenants look like in Scripture and what do they tell us about God?

Pray About It

Dear Lord,

Your Word is full of promises that we can stand on and build our life on. Thank you for the covenant you fulfilled that led Christ to the cross, to be crucified. Thank you that the crucifixion was not the end, but the resurrection was a beautiful beginning of life in you. As we go about our lives, whether married or not, let us know that we belong to you, always.

Amen