The Digital World the Husbands Created

Have you seen the news recently about the website where many husbands are reporting ways they have r*ped their wives? It is said that there have been over 62 million views on one of the online r*pe academies. You can read the full scope of these horrors here.

When you see things like this, it makes you question humanity. The statistics show that we are at the lowest marriage rate in American history - as well as the highest rate of those who believe they will be single for life. Just today I was at a local restaurant here in Kentucky - and I noticed the only couple in the room was two females dining together. I’ve watched as family members have begun the transition from girl to boy. Family members choose to embrace a homosexual lifestyle. To be honest, I get it. Why would you want to trust a man?

If I didn’t believe in God and trust HIS words, I would probably move directly towards that lifestyle. In addition to this, I have spent days with women who have been repeatedly r*ped and trafficked by men. Heard the countless stories of how male family members abused them. Now? I hear of a site that trains men to do all of these crimes against their own wives. It’s very discouraging.

BUT GOD…

Only God can take a mess like our missing the mark on marriage and turn it into a miracle. When you see a mess, it’s a miracle in the making. We can look at this and imagine how much worse it can get. OR we can choose hope.

That is the Resurrection story. All hope died. Jesus died on the cross and the world became bleak and black for three days. On the third day, He rose again. Hope was restored - and we received the greatest miracle. Eternal life spent with Christ.

WITH GOD…

Things can change. He can do miracles in the hearts of man, in marriage, and in society. I chose my own path. Instead of the world’s path - writing men off, shunning them, and choosing a world of women, I still chose a path that honors God created men. To be honest, I can’t say that I’ve had much success or hope. But, I’ve learned to continue to build and grow in a way that protects women without condemning men.

As a woman, you do actually have power and control. The Bible is full of Scripture that proclaims God’s love for you. He has hope, plans, and a future for you (Jeremiah 29:11). God promises He is your avenger. I’ve personally had God pull me out of situations that I didn’t know I was even in danger - until after the fact. If there is a man who is causing problems in the lives of women and he’s not a family member, why are you near him? The Bible actually calls both men and women to confront ungodly behavior and to cast those from your midst who are behaving ungodly (Matthew 18).

God does not call us to embrace men like those on that site or show grace. He actually calls both men and women to stand firm. If you don’t feel safe confronting alone, the Bible says to get someone else in the church and bring them with you. Then, the Bible says to take it to the whole church. If that person doesn’t repent, treat them as an unbeliever. 

A problem we’ve had in the church is silencing the voice of women. The desire to fight over whether or not women should be pastors has silenced some women’s ability to understand that God is for them, will fight for them, and has empowered them to leave a situation. A pastor and church who encourages you to stay in an abusive situation or prioritizes the men who abuse is a place that you should flee from. That is not God. I’m not interested in theological debates on women’s roles in the church. I am interested in knowing that women know their Heavenly Father loves them - and so do their pure and honorable brothers in Christ.

POSSIBLE WITH GOD…

I’ve had to leave a couple of churches now due to the dangerous treatment of women and their value. God has been gracious though - because He has always given me brothers. Typically…younger than me. More recently, I’m learning to navigate the older. They have stepped in to situations that I was fighting and resolved them for me. I’ve been empowered to resolve situations on my own as well.

In a previous job, I witnessed two of the most incredible marriages I’ve ever seen. Husbands and wives partnering to win people to Jesus and even protecting women from danger. That’s not normal - but I’ve seen it. The Bible says the devil comes to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10). There’s nothing He would love more than to see the thing that creates more image bearers be destroyed - Biblical manhood, womanhood, and Godly marriages.

At it’s core, that is why Tirzah exists. To empower women to own their own relationship with God and become everything God wants them to be. Believe that you don’t have to settle and God will bring the right churches, families, and men into their lives. We’re not giving up on that existing and refuse to receive the bad news. 

That is one of my biggest motivators for our new section of Tirzah at the Table. I know not every female gets to spend much time with Godly men. It became more evident that others needed to see some of the men I know that want to be doing the right - and are trying. Like us, they’re not perfect. I do know that the men I’ve featured would not harm a woman intentionally. They want to look like Jesus and they do think differently than women. So, I hope you give the right men a chance and run far from the wrong ones. We were meant to live life together - serving God, creating life, and serving others.