Healing From A Broken Relationship With My Dad

For my entire life, I’ve been fighting a battle for my dad’s love. Each time I look at my wounds, I want the pain to stop. I’ve tried and I try to keep fighting, but the battle keeps getting worse and the wounds are becoming unbearable. I’m fighting for a relationship that I may not ever have. This fight for love and affection from my earthly father has taken a mental and spiritual toll far greater than any physical impact.

As a young child, I always wanted love and affection from my father. I lived in the same house with him for 25 years and we never grew close, which hurt me tremendously. Sometimes, not knowing how to deal with it, I would find myself in deep sadness, overcome with madness and a little bit of resentment for his absence. How could a parent who lives under the same roof as their child overlook them? I’m still searching for the answer, but in the meantime I’m learning how to embrace God’s love.

“Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close.” -Psalm 27:10

I must make the conscious decision to acknowledge God’s love for me, but that takes practice and prayer. My Father shows me love every day by giving me breath in my body, a roof over my head and, most importantly, a relationship with Him where I can talk about anything that’s happening in life. The best part is that He already knows what I’m going say before I pray to him and He has already started to work it out!

Here is what has helped me in my own healing journey:


Take time out to pray for your earthly father and acknowledge the fact he might be experiencing a tough time. Remember, we all have wounds to heal from. Make sure you respect him because he’s still your parent.

“Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (this is the first commandment with a promise), that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” -Ephesians 6:1-3

Study Your Bible

Read scriptures that describe God’s love for us and discover the character of your heavenly Father.

“For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.” -Romans 15:4

Seek Counsel

Find a Christian counselor you can trust to discuss your issues with.

“Surely you need guidance to wage war, and victory is won through many advisers.” -Proverbs 24:6

You must take out the time to reflect and study the Scriptures; this gives you the opportunity to discover who you really are in Christ. I must consistently remind myself that God loves me no matter what. I find the time to pray and I’ll ask God to touch my heart and strengthen me from all the pain. Similar to a bandage over a wound, we need to use the word of God to heal the spiritual afflictions we encounter.