Have you ever studied the history of marriage?  Many people know the story of Adam and Eve. How God said “It is not good for man to be alone”.  Then, He created Eve. This tends to be the start of the Christian concept of marriage. That, and the many times quoted 1 Corinthians 13.  Recently, I have discovered the beauty of the Jewish Biblical traditions around marriage and the parallel between Christ’s return and a bride waiting for her groom to come.

When you think of marriage in the Bible, one of the stories that comes up is the parable of the ten virgins.  This story goes:

“At that time the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. Five of them were foolish and five were wise. The foolish ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. The wise ones, however, took oil in jars along with their lamps.

The bridegroom was a long time in coming, and they all became drowsy and fell asleep. “At midnight the cry rang out: ‘Here’s the bridegroom! Come out to meet him!’  “Then all the virgins woke up and trimmed their lamps. The foolish ones said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil; our lamps are going out.’ “‘No,’ they replied, ‘there may not be enough for both us and you. Instead, go to those who sell oil and buy some for yourselves.’ “But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived.

The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut.  “Later the others also came. ‘Lord, Lord,’ they said, ‘open the door for us!’ “But he replied, ‘Truly I tell you, I don’t know you.’  “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour. - Matthew 25: 1 - 13

To better understand this parable, let me explain to you how traditional weddings went.  In Jewish traditions, a man approached the bride of his choice and her father with a Ketubah.  This was a contract stating that he had chosen this woman to be his bride. Within this contract was everything he would be held responsible to as the husband of his new bride, including a “Bride price” to pay for his .  Once this was signed by two witnesses, they were now married. This was not like modern day traditional marriages. After the Ketubah and Bride Price, the bridegroom had to go away to prepare a place for him and his bride to live.

Unlike modern-day times, weddings were not the time new life began and the marriage was consummated.  Instead, this was a time when the waiting began. This is the time the ten virgins and their oil lamps parable comes in.  After the contract and “Bride Price”, the groom would go away to prepare their home. The bride did not know the day or hour that he would come back.  It typically took about a year in which the bride did not communicate with the groom - except through the best man. Her job was to wait with her ladies for him to come back.  She was to be prepared, like the ten virgins, for the groom to come and bring her to her new home.

When the groom prepared the new home, he would come with his groomsmen and collect the bride.  They would go to dwell in the new place he prepared for her. Isn’t that a beautiful symbolism of our relationship with Christ?  Look at the parallels in this tradition.

Christ is our groom.  He came to God and offered His life as the ultimate Bride price.  Once, Jesus returned, He spent some time with the disciples and then went away to Heaven to prepare a place for us.  It is our job to be like a bride and prepare for His return - to do the things that will bring Him joy. We wait with joyful expectation - for the ultimate wedding/celebration - Heaven.  

Next time you attend a wedding or find yourself engaged/planning your wedding, I encourage you to remember this story.  Make your wedding a reflection of Christ. Use it as a time to remember how Christ prepares a place for us. Instead of focusing on the pictures, place, and theme, focus on how your courtship/dating/wedding can be a parallel to your relationship with Christ.  Remember the old traditions of weddings and find ways to incorporate that into today. Dwell on the symbolism that can only be found in that and experience it. Cherish this and understand how it is a new way to understand Christ and His love for us.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Alycia Marie is a free-spirited wanderer and follower of Christ. She spends her days exploring around the city with the unique family that God has given her. At this time, she is currently working with non-profits and churches to tackle rebuilding families in the city of Milwaukee. In her free time, she plays with preschoolers, writes in coffee shops, and travels the world.