Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof. - Proverbs 18:21

You’ve heard the genesis of the home for teen moms and the story of my mother.  However, there’s a whole other chapter to this story. She was born in the Appalachian mountains.  Born and raised. Pretty much my favorite person on the planet. Full of southern sass and the kindest heart you’ll ever meet.

My childhood was filled with moving across several states several times, bouncing from one home to another as a family, as well as attending every type of school you can dream of.  At one point, I even attended a Visual Performing Arts elementary school where I learned piano, music, and art. Throughout all of this instability, there was one place that remained stable - eastern Kentucky.  My family would attempt to hop in whatever car we owned at the time and drive to visit my grandparents.

There is a place that is in the back of my grandparent’s house that I will remember for eternity.  It is a beautiful hill I would walk the dogs up every time I visited, sitting in awe of the farms in every direction with the sun setting in the background.  This was my God spot, the space where I felt closest to Heaven. Every time I visited I would feel close to the Creator.

This was a significant thing because I grew up in a church that taught religion/rules, but not relationship.  God was a harsh taskmaster that expected me to be nothing less than perfect or I would be condemned to eternity.  My dad was a pastor in this church and he loved me a lot.

However, I felt the condemnation of many due to this pressure.  Whenever I was in Kentucky or near my grandmother, the pressure melted away. She told me I could do anything, be anything, or go anywhere.  I could tell her anything and she would love me right where I was at.  

When I started my internship junior year of college, everything changed.  I went to intern with a Family Resource Center (Pregnancy center) that let me run things from top to bottom.  This gave me an opportunity to help many women who did not know what to do with their babies.

In the middle of this internship, I received the call that my grandmother was in a mental health hospital for a suicidal attempt.  The woman who had done everything in the world for me had almost left me. It turned out she had kept a secret hidden from almost everyone for over 40 years. She had an abortion when she was 18 years old. This rocked everyone’s world and left me feeling guilty for being so passionate about the pro-life movement.

At that time in my life, I was passionate about holding signs and figuring out how to infiltrate any organization that did abortions.  My perspective shifted then. I actually moved to Kentucky to attend graduate school for social work shortly after my grandmother’s breakdown.  I wanted to be close to her and become an executive director of a pregnancy center one day in the future. The school was an hour and a half away from her. 

During this time, I got to walk alongside my grandmother who healed by doing incredible things. My grandmother helped create the Frankfort Memorial for the Unborn in Kentucky to give gravestones for miscarriages, stillborns, and abortions.  She attended Rachel’s Vineyard (a post-abortion healing group) and I went to the last day of the retreat with her.

My grandmother became a spokesperson for Silent No More and spoke out about the mental health problems she had due to having an abortion.  She also spoke about the judgment she felt from the church. The condemnation she felt from protestors that stood on the side of the road yelling “You’re going to hell” and showing pictures of bloody babies.  

This changed my perspective on how I could help others.  I learned that holding signs and condemnation - things I grew up hearing were not always effective.  Many times they didn’t push people towards Jesus, but towards the seemingly caring people who were offering quick - fix solutions.  Walking alongside my grandmother taught me the beauty of presence. It taught me how Jesus walks with us even through our worst mistakes and our brokenness.  He forgives, cleanses, and restores.

He used people in my grandmother’s life who spoke a kind word, prayed over her, and empowered her to help others who are in similar situations. They showed God’s balance of justice and forgiveness.

Now, I get to help continue that legacy by providing a home where I can walk alongside women who want to be mothers and offer healing for young mothers. My grandmother’s journey of faith, my mother’s journey of faith, and now mine gets to help break cycles of poverty - through faith, grit, and determination.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Alycia Marie is a free-spirited missionary and follower of Christ. She spends her days wandering around the city with the unique family that God has given her. At this time, she is currently working with two non-profits to tackle rebuilding families in the city of Milwaukee. In her free time, she plays with preschoolers, writes in coffee shops, and travels the world.